A Hint and the Incapacity

Yesterday I spent a long time making texts that I didn't want to make, getting replies that were painful to hear, sat listening to this song endlessly in a spot where my Derby Uni journey started a few years ago.

It was an emotional moment, one I'm still coming to terms with.

Transcendence

Saleen Bongo.

RIP Rougham.

The Sound of Winter

Tonight I've seen three things that could change my life forever:

http://www.horsedeathwatch.com/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dvGHMTJLmYQ

http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2006/oct/01/horseracing.sport

Truly shocking stuff. I hate myself for being so ignorant. The Winter has been a bad one, but I've been trying! The help has been there too - I must reignite that when Mum and Dad return from Portugal.

The Sun shone so brightly today. Maybe I can finally land the fatal blow on this addiction. That is all I can write for now as I've been at a similar place before. We shall see.

Symptoms + Cures

REALISE THE POWER AT HAND.

Love as a Weapon

This is a war
With love as a weapon
When all that you've lived for is gone

Christ Punchers

I believe, I believe in reality.

Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo

I've obviously had this addiction for a long time, although along the way I've tried to convince myself that I haven't. However, one feeling has remained constant throughout - at least my addiction isn't physical. I've always maintained that I really can't see how people can get hooked to alcohol.

Recently, things have changed. That is because I'm starting to accept more and more of the science behind addiction. Also, for the first time, the other day, I actually pictured myself as an alcoholic. I have so little faith in myself or my life now that that image is one that I can genuinely imagine coming to fruition.

I haven't blogged in ages. The second half of this year in particular has been the worst ever and I really don't know if I can face my family over Christmas.

Also, I suppose I should note that last Tuesday I went to hospital for a suspected broken toe - turns out it was just fractured. There goes my flawless hospital record.

Another Year Goes By

The last year has been the worst of my life.

When are things going to change?

Another Year Goes By

The last year has been the worst of my life.

When are things going to change?

Irresponsible Hate Anthem

FUCK IT!

I wasn't born with enough middle fingers.